Today’s news is that a Sri Lankan elephant was saved by the Navy when it was found treading water 5 miles out to sea. That’s kind of heartwarming. The Daily Mail’s headline joke was “At least he packed his trunk!”, which I don’t really get. Swimming trunks? Can you make that singular? I can’t link to the Daily Mail article though because for some reason it’s blocked here in Thailand. It was also reported in a couple other places so here’s the story in the New York Post, whose joke is “This animal was saved from a mammoth amount of trouble”. My headline joke is “This elephant took the Reese Witherspoon movie ‘Water for Elephants’ literally!” …Is it more topical to end it “seriously AND literally!”? I’ll keep trying to make it more funny. The article has a couple good pictures:

http://nypost.com/2017/07/12/divers-save-struggling-elephant-after-it-got-lost-at-sea/